Recently, i have been thinking about the things i did in the past. Who am i doing it for? Is life all about that only?

Now, if you tell me things like, 'god has a plan for you' or 'this is god's plan', it all meant nothing to me. Even if you tell me, 'trust in the lord', i have no feeling anymore. I think its beyond my imagination to believe and trust. My heart has harden, since the day i let you go. Who was there to pull me?

But i truly cherish the friends i had there. You are the 1st person to open my heart. You are the 1st person who gave me a hug, so warm that i could feel your heartbeat. You are the one who accompanied me, eventhough sometimes i feel that u were just using me.

I contradict myself...